Category: Me

Tired of Wishing for “IT”

Looking back at the posts in this blog I realized that I have done A LOT OF WISHING FOR IT to happen and very little of actually doing something to make IT happen. Is if like putting down on paper – or online rather – will magically happen.

Oh, wishful thinking!

The problem is that I don’t know how to get started. I know that people say “just do it” (very much like Nike) or “one day you’ll get up and say this is it, I’m doing it.” I see other people that have found their groove meanwhile I’m here trying to figure it out. I tend to overthink things, and for sure I’ve given this “working out” and “eating right” thing a great deal of thought but then again, it stays in there nothing else happens.

Recently in a visit to my doctor for a physical, she freaked out because of my weight and how much this is affecting my health, in particular. my heart’s health. You would think that this will kick me into action but it hasn’t. To add to this, I’m about to turn 40 a huge milestone, and I still don’t get motivated to do anything.

I’m aware of my shortcomings and where I’m standing, I’m not delusional. I look at myself in the mirror, and I don’t always like what I see. I know I must do something. I know I must get into action, but how!? I have a gym membership, but I don’t use it. Why you ask? Embarrassment? Laziness? Wishful thinking?

Who knows!

My biggest opponent is my mind. I’m WAY too into my head to the point that sometimes I need to get out and take some fresh air. As I mentioned above, I’m aware of my shortcomings I just don’t know how to tackle them. I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, I want to get back to where I was mentally 10 years ago. Where I felt happy and motivated. I want to enter my 40s healthy and with a pep in my step. I want to enjoy my 40s and be strong, but where do I start?

I look to the future and I see a healthy and lean me. Then I look at me today and what I see is all the work that is ahead and I get discourage before starting. I know this is NOT A SPRINT it is a MARATHON and as such, I should approach it but at some point, if I don’t the path towards the destination, I give up.

I don’t want to wish for IT,
I want to be IT!
I want to be IT!
I want to be IT!
I want to be IT!
I want to be IT!

I want to be IT! 

So with that in mind, I’m giving ME another chance! I’m doing like Taylor Swift, and Shake it Off and start over. After all, “it doesn’t matter how many times you fall .. what matters is how many times you stand up, shake it off, and moving forward.”

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July, Thank You!

July is, by far, my favorite month of the year. And it is not only because of my birthday, it also brings great memories of my mom taking time off for vacations while I was out of school. I’m sure by August, she was ready to throw the towel and go back to work LOL. She always made sure my birthday was filled with loved ones, fun, and cake! My most memorable birthdays were at the beach, where we used to eat cake with sand and I DIDNT CARE!!

July in a nutshell!

This year – 2016 -, my last in the 30’s :-O , wasn’ the exception. In July I got to celebrate my 30th (+9) birthday and it was great. I had good friends with me, good wine and a desk full of gifts and balloons – what else does a girl can ask for? -. I also go to travel to Denver – for a friend’s wedding – where I met one of my favorite people and new friend. I also went to Mexico for work and met the amazing team I’ve been working with for a while but didn’t know in person. And finally, I went to Chicago to do Rock n’ Roll Chicago.

My favorite month of the year!
July is my favorite month of the year!

 

While in Denver, I drove to the top of Mount Evans and got to experience God’s magnificence first hand. I was scared to drive with cliffs on one side or the other on the road; I got altitude sickness, but man, oh man it was beautiful. I would do it again! Getting to experience calmness it is something I can’t explain. It was just peaceful, loud and quiet at the same time. I also got to eat at the German bakery Rheinlander Bakery that features lots of pastries, cakes, and coffee. The best part? They had a good choice of delicious gluten free cakes. You should check them out.

Mexico was great, it was a really quick trip and I mostly spent the time in a training but like I said, I had an awesome time learning and getting to know some people I worked with in the past and didn’t know and of course eating some tasting Mexican food.

Finally Chicago!

I have to confess, I was super scared about the half marathon. I wasn’t my first or second half marathon, but I was nervous, however, it was an amazing experience. Seeing the city while walking around it is something not everyone gets to do. Watching the city revealing as I walked towards the finish line, was a rally awesome experienced. Traveling by train and trying new restaurants it is always a plus, especially in a new city. Thanks to my lovely friend Darleen, I tried a place called Carnivale. And although the discarded my barely consumed Perrier water, the food was amazing, and the main room is the kind of place that will drown you with the color and smells, simply beautiful.

To make this trip to Chicago even better, my last season Team In Training Coach, Karen, happened to be in town my last night (and staying in the same hotel I was staying) and invited me to join her for dinner and drinks to celebrate me finishing the half marathon. Thank you Karen!

As I said before, July is one of my favorite months of the year, and this year July was an amazing month. Full with new adventures and experiences, complete with good people and good food. I’m really blessed and fortunate in my life, and the next time I complain about something, I will bring back these memories to remind me how bless I am. I’m looking forward to a great August and rest of the year – for that matter – and see what’s in store for me.

How about you? What’s your favorite month and why?

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From Me To Me: Happy Birthday!

Happy birthday to me!

Happy 38 and many more!
Happy 38 and many more!

Today I’m turning 38, but I don’t look a day old of 25 😉 – wishful thinking! – I was reflecting on the past year. The promises I made for myself and didn’t keep. The lessons I’ve learned through these 37 years and that I plan to take with me from now on.

As many, I’ve been hurt intentionally and unintentionally by friends and love. Even though I have been working to get my thoughts, feelings and emotions straight, somehow, I haven’t been able to shake those feelings of not being good enough for the people that hurt me. The downside of this is that now days I act from “behind a wall” of protection.

I remember in the past, when I was younger, I was able to talk to people and make friends quickly. Now, after all the hurt and pain I’m more on guard. I don’t open as much as I used to, and this, I know, it affects my relationships.

Today, my 37 years old self is telling the new 38 years old me, to…

“Let it go, forgive and forget. The people that hurt you and the reasons they hurt you, are not a reflection of you, it is more about them than anything else. Granted, you are not perfect, but you can’t live your life fearing to being in pain or caring about what other people think of and about you.”

“Friends and love come and go. People grow apart. People mature while others stay the same. It is OK to lose friends. It is OK to lose love. It won’t be the end of the World. Don’t hide behind the wall, get out there. Show the World what you are made of. Don’t deprive new people from getting to know your wonderful self.”

“Hurt and pain from years ago… let it go! It is not worth carrying that with you. Take the lessons and move on. Learn and grow from it, but the excess baggage, leave it behind! Remember it costs.”

“I applaud you for letting go of people that holds you back. For knowing what you want and knowing where you going. Remember, keep people in your life that brings good things. People that challenge you to BE better, DO better. Keep the people that are OK with you being you! With the good, the bad and sometimes the ugly.”

“Leave behind the people that judged you and the people that sucks your energy. THERE IS NO ROOM for this in your life. Don’t waste energy trying to please everyone, I know you don’t like disappointing people, BUT YOU CAN’T PLEASE EVERYONE!” 

“Be happy with what you have. Stop wishing for what you DON’T have. Go after your dreams and trust that God will release His grace in time. Remember, HIS TIME IS PERFECT.”

“Embrace this new year and many more to come. Use it to reach your dreams. Use it to be better, to do better. Use this year to make and keep promises to yourself. Don’t waste precious time, remember, time goes fast. In the blink of an eye you’ll be 40! Enjoy today; yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not here yet.”

“Happy 38th birthday and may this new year brings you love, friendship, and may all your dreams come true!” 

Love,

Your 37 year old self!

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